We at Haven want to express our sincere and heart-felt gratitude to you for joining Linda Nicholls’ moving conversation about her friendship with Maria Gomori.
Thank you!
In total, 680 people registered and 420 were able to join us live. With your help, we raised just over $30,000 CAD (RMB$150,000) to help support Haven in this challenging time!!
The Canada Haven team also wants to express our deep gratitude to the China team for their support in making this program happen – we could not have done it without you! And a special thanks to Wei-Wei (Eric) for translation – it was a big job and you handled it with grace.
The participants were from five continents covering different corners on the globe, including:
Europe – France, Italy, Switzerland
North America – Canada (from coast to coast) and USA
Central America – Costa Rica
Oceania – New Zealand, Australia
Asia – China, Malaysia, Singapore, Japan, Hong Kong, Taiwan, and other cities and areas.
Today I heard Linda’s sharing of the true stories of her 37-year friendship journey with Maria. I was particularly moved and feeling warm. They were so real, close, and down to their everyday life. They would quarrel, gossip, chatty, or go shopping and buy clothes. They would deviate from their planning and were difficult to stay focus. They found there was not enough time… It seems they are the old ladies next to us, who fight with each other and then make peace as good friends. They were open and congruent with each other. They didn’t withdraw themselves from their relationship. They didn’t pretend to be victims to please each other. They found ways to stop accusing and became self-responsible. What do we choose to put first in conflicts? Is it friendship, connection, love for each other, or self-esteem or keeping face? And be curious about the underneath reason of the other person’s choice; what kind of values or beliefs does the other person have? Also let go the expectations of changing the other person! I heard from Linda’s perspective that Maria’s profound love and commitment to Satir Family Therapy, and her passion and curiosity about the world and life are the keys to her longevity and vitality. Let us remember, no matter what, let’s be true to ourselves and live alive in our congruency.
Today is my birthday, and I didn’t expect to spend my day online listening to the sharing of Linda and Maria. These two great psychologists also quarreled with each other, and would do something regardless to the other, and then return to their relationship. I suddenly sense that I am less critical of myself. Quickly and reflectively, I realize that I was always nervous when facing anger and quarrel in my past relationships. My defensive mode and attack accusation mode were activated then. I can sense the congruence and present flexibility of Maria – even if I annoyed the other person and the person stayed away, I could still return to the relationship, say I regret it, and face it again. There was nothing too terrifying about the other person’s rage. There was a little more permission in my heart, and there was more room for squinting. The momentary realization of these little permission and space is extremely precious to me. Speaking of how Maria faced death, I suddenly felt that I was connected to the world a bit bigger, and I felt a little open to the world, and my vision seemed to have suddenly widened. Although I haven’t seen anything yet, I feel that the connection has begun to happen little by little. At the same time, I can connect to life through my curiosity about the world. Thank you, the connection happened on this day of my birthday. It is very meaningful to me.
We had 63 (18 from Haven website and 45 from The China Team). We received very good feedbacks from participants about Cathy’s personal sharing and professional guidance. My deep appreciation to Cathy – for your generous donation of your leader’s fee to The China Team. My appreciation to the whole team as always, including our Haven and The China Team, our 15 small group leaders from China and Taiwan who facilitated the 10 small groups online and offline. This is a teamwork and a process of co-creation. Thank you ALL!
Conflict and Co-creation in Relationships
“For one human being to love another; that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.”
Like the above quote by Rainer Maria Rilke, relationships are the hardest work we do and the greatest gift when they are working. In our busy world we have devoted less and less time to them. In the pandemic we had sudden big changes. Now more than ever is a good time to revisit relationships. This program is for couples, families, friends, and co-workers – it applies to all important relationships in our life or work. Together we will examine how we participate in and contribute to these important relational dynamics; how we understand ourselves and others through conflicts and differences; how we use effective tools to carry out important yet difficult conversations; most of all how we explore deeper our loving in discomfort and after losses. This is our 2021 year-end highlight of the Haven Global Bilingual Programs – it provides great opportunities to review and renew – especially in our macro and micro challenges. Not only is this the place we connect but also where we grow! Our two wonderful Haven core faculty members Cathy McNally and Wen-Shwu Lee will facilitate this journey of richness with you, and we look forward to meeting you online!
Highlights
YOU are Key to Better Relationships
If you aren’t working on the relationships that are important to you, they will decline. Without attention people drift apart, at home, at work, with family or friends. The chance for assumptions, misunderstandings and conflict grow. How often are you on ‘automatic pilot,’ rushing through your life? The path to better relationships begins with you. Learn about human perception, stress, and mindful focus. Practice techniques to increase your awareness and improve any relationship
Conflict, Values, and Important Conversations
We all have people and situations that are very challenging. Times when we get triggered. What are yours? How do you react? Some get angry or loud, others shut down or are silent. Each way causes problems. Both ways avoid important conversations. Come and explore what is underlying, how conflict can be a gift, and the important conversations that can benefit your life.
Loving after Loss – I thought I knew everything about relationship …!
Cathy has been in three primary relationships, experiencing divorce, death, and then dating in her 60s. Join Cathy as she shares her story of learning and growing in relationship. Gain insights to take back into your own relationship and your life.
Integration and Deepening
This course is also a co-creation field. We believe that the emerging issues and key areas of interest may provide each other the best lessons and references. There will be time for group discussions, Q&A, as well as review of useful tools for aliveness and co-creativity in your life and relationships.
主導老師 Leaders
麥凱西Cathy McNally
理學士BSc，心理諮商文憑DipC
凱西對人以及生命的可能性充滿了熱情。她在中西融合的文化中成長，她擁有商業和團隊管理的背景。凱西對差異可能帶來的禮物充滿了好奇，她致力於建立連結和創造彼此了解的機會。對於教練引領各種關係的互動凱西有著濃厚的熱情。 在經歷了重大的生命變故之後，她仍然通過運動、聲音、創造、自然、愛慾，以及社團，持續不斷在探索生命活力、分離失落，以及追求意義的旅程上前行。 她的座右銘：善良、關懷以及樂趣，使她成為廣受歡迎的團體帶領人。 自1989年與 The Haven加拿大海文學院建立關係以來，凱西認為「一起 – 好好生活」是必要、緊迫，並且是可能的。凱西目前是加拿大著名的潛能開發學院 The Haven Institute 的董事以及核心導師。
Cathy McNally is passionate about people and possibility. Growing up in a mix of cultures, with a background in business and teams, Cathy is curious about the gift of differences, and is committed to connection and understanding. A particular joy is coaching relationships of all kinds. Following a major life change, she is exploring aliveness, loss and meaning through the adventure of movement, voice, creativity, nature, eros and community. Her trademark kindness, caring and fun make her a sought-after group leader. Associated with The Haven since 1989, Cathy believes that “living well, together” is necessary, urgent, and possible. Cathy is currently one of the Directors on The Haven Board and a member of The Haven Core Faculty.
李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
心理諮商文憑、企業教練碩士認證、企管碩士、藝術學士、文學士、身心整合夫妻療癒認證、身體經驗創傷療法認證
CEC, Dip-C, MBA, BFA, BA, PACT Level II Certification, SE Intermediate II/III Certification
Wenshwu is passionate as an educator and a life coach. She is both personal and professional. She embraces life fully and keeps enriching herself in cross-cultural environment. Her leadership style is based on humanity, on which she effectively integrates her professional trainings with personal experiences. She applies various schools of learning: coaching, counseling, creativity, SE (Somatic Experiencing), and PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) in the series of heart-brain integrated personal and professional development programs. She designs and leads onsite workshops and online programs in greater China area, north America, and around the globe. In these programs Wenshwu witnesses so many people breaking through fixated patterns, transforming suppression to useful resources, and living fully in their unique beings. Wenshwu is so far the only Chinese approved to the Haven Core Faculty. She is also the founder of The Train Coaching & Counseling Corp. in Taiwan.
Awakening from the Past Level II: From Resources to Resilience Awakening from the Past Level III: Compassionate Connections with Ourselves and Others
線上雙語課程 Bilingual Online Program
| 階段二時間：9/11, 12, 18, 19, 2021; 學員：75人
| 階段三時間：10/16 ,17 ,30 ,11/1, 2021; 學員：79人
| 導師：Graemme Brown + 李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
課程回顧
從過去覺醒的階段 II 和 III 課程中，我們連續收到了關於這兩個程序的讚賞反饋。反饋的亮點是人們如何欣賞在線學習的深度和身心體驗性，以及 Graemme老師如何富有創意和實用性地將不同學派的學習融入這一系列的線上課程中，其中包括了：Haven、Satir、SE、Polyvagal、IFS等，這真是很精彩的學習整合 ！
This is to provide you the summary report of the Sep./Oct. Bilingual Awakening from the Past Level II & III Programs. Not a surprise we received wonderful feedbacks on these two programs in a roll. The highlights of the feedbacks are how people appreciate the depth and embodied learning online, and how Graemme creatively and practically integrated different schools of learning to this series of programs, such as Haven, Satir, SE, Polyvagal, IFS, etc. which is amazing!
學員回饋
從過去覺醒 II：整合資源讓我們在挑戰中培養韌性 Awakening from the Past II: From Resources to Resilience
從過去中覺醒 III：與自己和他人慈悲共振的連結 Awakening from the Past III: Compassionate Connections with Ourselves and Others
九月份精彩的學習旅程：「從過去覺醒 II：整合資源讓我們在挑戰中培養韌性Awakening from the Past II: From Resources to Resilience」，我們會探索「全然存在」的方法：身體、思想、精神和情感。以慈悲心來理解我們早期的生活經歷，並將其轉化為有效的資源，以培養經營我們當前健康的人際關係。
十月份我們繼續學習的旅程：「從過去中覺醒 III：與自己和他人慈悲共振的連結 Awakening from the Past III: Compassionate Connections with Ourselves and Others」，我們將持續深入「全然存在」模式的練習，轉化我們過往的經驗為有效的資源，來搭建目前健康的人際關係。
For the coming September and October Bilingual Online Program – our Haven Core Facilitators Graemme Brown and Wen-Shwu Lee will continue to apply a mind-body approach to provide a different perspective on our relationships. In this workshop, we will further the exploration of the influences on us in our present and daily life. Our aim is to not change the past but to change our relationship with the past and begin to live more fully in the present.
In September on our journey of “Awakening from the Past II: From Resources to Resilience” we will explore a ‘whole-being’ approach (Body, Mind, Spirit and Emotions) to compassionately understand and transform our early life experiences into resources that we can use to nurture our present-day relationships.
Why is the ‘body’ such an important part of this process? Can’t we just use cognitive or mindfulness approaches? The body is the container for our life-force: That vital essence of our well-being. We need to be able to regulate our energy and emotions in both directions: Calming and Exciting. Imagine being able to be calm and grounded when necessary *and* also be excited and remain present when you want to experience that aspect of your life-force.
By identifying and working to gain a ‘felt-sense’ of our internal resources and connections with others, we can create a sense of safety in our own bodies and minds. This sense of safety is a platform that we will build on to take the necessary risks to grow and explore our lives. We all have this innate ‘Resilience’ within us: We need to re-connect with it and consciously use it to create an embodied experience of loving. This is the doorway to experiences of ‘spirit in the body’ or as some call it, ‘Presence.’
On the October Program “Awakening from the Past III: Compassionate Connections with Ourselves and Others” we will continue to deepen the ‘whole-being’ approach to compassionately understand and transform our past experiences into resources and to nurture and enrich our relationships.
In this 3rd part of the programme, we will explore the concept of “Attachment” – which is the name given to how we form connections with our primary caregivers when we are infants. They are a map or ‘blueprint’ of how we will form all our future relationships. The good news is that these attachment patterns can be understood and transformed to nurture deeply satisfying relationships, seeing our own and others’ needs very clearly.
We will also learn the approach of “Regulation” – which is the name given to how we take charge of our nervous system rather than being a slave to it (which we call “Dysregulation”). Our ability to regulate our nervous system (and therefore our emotions) is directly connected to our attachment patterns. Many relationship difficulties can be traced to a misunderstanding of each other’s attachment style that triggers strong emotions.
We will also be learning how to speak another’s ‘love language’ (and them learning yours) is a compassionate practice that can help create safety in relationship through nervous system co-regulation. These ‘Love Languages’ apply to all kinds of relationships: Romantic, Friendships, Families and work / study colleagues.
While it is recommended that you have completed “Awakening from the Past I: A Mind Body Approach to Re-Imagining the Family,” it is not necessary. These different learning modules are complementary to each other and can be taken separately. It is helpful to have had some experience with personal work (Haiwen, Satir, individual counseling / therapy, etc.) prior to attending.
Highlights Awakening from the Past II: From Resources to Resilience
Major influences in your life that still impact you today
Compassionate conversations with your inner ‘parts’ (especially shame and self-criticism)
Vulnerability, Defenses, The ‘Matrix of Expectations’, Yearnings: The universal human needs underneath our expectations
Congruent communications
Based on the work of: Peter Levine, Virginia Satir, Richard Schwarz, Eugene Gendlin, Stephen Porges and Martin Prechtel.
Awakening from the Past III: Compassionate Connections with Ourselves and Others
Practical use of Attachment Theory
Identifying your Autonomic Nervous System states and learning how to modulate them for emotional self-care
Self-Regulation and Co-Regulation (why both are necessary)
Exercises to create ‘Inter-Personal Goals’ in your important relationship
Learn about ‘Love Languages’
Based on the work of: Peter Levine, John Bowlby, Douglas Winnicott, Mary Ainsworth, Laurence Heller, Aline LaPierre, Eugene Gendlin, Diane Poole-Heller, Sue Johnson, Gary Chapman and Stephen Porges.
Graemme Brown, Dip.C, SEP, has been associated with The Haven since 1985. He is dedicated to compassionate and gentle inquiry, focused on his experience with the philosophy of Virginia Satir, Jungian shadow work and Peter Levine’s Somatic Experiencing system. Graemme considers his Haven faculty colleagues as another source of creative inspiration with their great diversity of styles and expertise. As a member of The Haven’s core faculty, Graemme co-leads Come Alive, Living Alive Phase I, Journey to Self, Family Reconstruction and a number of other programs on Gabriola, in China and with First-Nation communities in Northern Canada. Graemme is also an award-winning recording engineer, running his Zen Mastering studio for over twenty-five years. His love of music and the mysteries of the creative process inform much of his approach to personal development training. He lives and works on Gabriola Island.
李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
心理諮商文憑、企業教練碩士認證、企管碩士、藝術學士、文學士、身心整合夫妻療癒認證、身體經驗創傷療法認證
CEC, Dip-C, MBA, BFA, BA, PACT Level II Certification, SE Intermediate II/III Certification
Wenshwu is passionate as an educator and a life coach. She is both personal and professional. She embraces life fully and keeps enriching herself in cross-cultural environment. Her leadership style is based on humanity, on which she effectively integrates her professional trainings with personal experiences. She applies various schools of learning: coaching, counseling, creativity, SE (Somatic Experiencing), and PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) in the series of heart-brain integrated personal and professional development programs. She designs and leads onsite workshops and online programs in greater China area, north America, and around the globe. In these programs Wenshwu witnesses so many people breaking through fixated patterns, transforming suppression to useful resources, and living fully in their unique beings. Wenshwu is so far the only Chinese approved to the Haven Core Faculty. She is also the founder of The Train Coaching & Counseling Corp. in Taiwan.
課後回顧
We have successfully completed the Bilingual Youth Leadership Program in August. Thank you, Jamison, for your wonderful co-leadership. We received good feedbacks on the range of our co-leadership which crossing our ages and cultures. My deep appreciation to the whole work team from Canada to China – this is a long process of co-creation and teamwork. Thank you ALL for hanging in. On this program – we have 84 paid registrants, and we gave 10 free entries as scholarships to encourage youths to join in Haven’s programs. The total participants number is 94. We have 14 small groups, including one English-speaking group led by Jamison. I am in joy when I heard that participants were expressing their appreciation to the topics and the effectiveness of the program. Again, I witness Haven’s offering can be practically aligned with different market need – this time is of the younger generations.
We welcome youth aged 19-35. Join us as we explore and co-create in the adventure of life!
So often we define ourselves by our jobs, our friend groups, our occupations, and our accomplishments. As young people we are told that we are in a crucial period of growth and change, yet the expectation is that we do that while managing a thousand other tasks, all at once. When you pile on political and social upheaval, war and conflict, and a worldwide pandemic, life can become more of a stress than a pleasure. Whether we know it or not, we have a vision for our lives, mapping out how we want to prove ourselves to the world, to our families and to our partners. In school we are told about all the careers that we may follow to fulfill us, but we are not taught how to check-in with our emotional center, how to face our failures or frustrations, or how to be intimate with others. How are we supposed to know what we want in our lives, without truly knowing ourselves first?
This program responds to the above questions, and it’s designed for our youth friends aged 19 to 35. It offers a guide for you to be your own leader so that you can lead your own life. We offer tools to create a trusting relationship with yourself while having open conversations with others who are experiencing the emotions of early adulthood alongside you. The beauty of sharing yourself with others is that you learn to co-create relationships with people who support you to bring your most authentic self forward. This platform is offered so that we have a safe space to explore our emotions and our relationships, to create a foundation of ourselves that we can work with and continue to work from for the rest of our lives.
We have unique cross-generational co-leadership team in this program: 61-year-old Wen-Shwu Lee and 21-year-old Jamison Schulz-Franco. You may know Wen-Shwu who has spent many years devoting herself to leadership training and emotional development programs at the Haven. We are excited to introduce Jamison, who like Wen-Shwu, is also a Director on the Haven Board. From his previous experiences facilitating the Haven Youth Leadership programs, Jamison has learned how much his fears withhold his desire for adventure. He notes that he has felt guilt in exploring his desires, and it wasn’t until he voiced his fears that he has been able to discover and be in his element. Jamison realizes desire is exploring the unknown – a reconnection to the joyful voice within that we let run free as toddlers, dreaming of the amazing things we would do as adults. If we suppress our desires, we can feel numb to ourselves and our loved ones. This program offers a safe space to explore our internal states, while learning to create truly fulfilling relationships that are healthy and sustainable.
Each session will focus on different topics, and you will be invited to continue your reflections in the time between sessions. These explorations will take place in an atmosphere of respect, where every person’s choice is honored. The format will include:
Embodied movement, breathing and mindfulness exercises
Lectures and presentations
Experiential exercises
Small group sharing and reflections
Big group Q&A
Take home practices
Topics and Highlights
Emotional Intelligence – Becoming a high ‘EQ’ youth leader
Valuing Yourself – Appreciating the one and only YOU who is not perfect but is whole
Underneath Addictions – Diving deeper into our frustrations and yearning for connection
Journey of Self Discovery – Initiating a path of self-definition – my unique qualities and leadership style
Jamison Schulz-Franco is a recent graduate of Ryerson University in Toronto, Canada. He has over 15 years of experience as a participant and an intern in both Kids in the Spotlight and Teens Alive at the Haven. Through his final year of university and beyond, Jamison hopes to share his experience in emotional awareness programs to open a more open mental health dialogue for his friends and peers. As a mixed-race individual, Jamison is a strong advocate for racial equality, equity, and inclusion, and has a passion for human connection. Jamison recently started work with the Victoria Immigration and Refugee Centre Society in the Resilience Hub – an anti-racism and hate network across British Columbia.
李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
心理諮商文憑、企業教練碩士認證、企管碩士、藝術學士、文學士、身心整合夫妻療癒認證、身體經驗創傷療法認證
CEC, Dip-C, MBA, BFA, BA, PACT Level II Certification, SE Intermediate II/III Certification
Wenshwu is passionate as an educator and a life coach. She is both personal and professional. She embraces life fully and keeps enriching herself in cross-cultural environment. Her leadership style is based on humanity, on which she effectively integrates her professional trainings with personal experiences. She applies various schools of learning: coaching, counseling, creativity, SE (Somatic Experiencing), and PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) in the series of heart-brain integrated personal and professional development programs. She designs and leads onsite workshops and online programs in greater China area, north America, and around the globe. In these programs Wenshwu witnesses so many people breaking through fixated patterns, transforming suppression to useful resources, and living fully in their unique beings. Wenshwu is so far the only Chinese approved to the Haven Core Faculty. She is also the founder of The Train Coaching & Counseling Corp. in Taiwan.
https://pptrain.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/Bilingual-Youth-Leadership_2021_08-14-06.jpg4941080admin/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/0428-logo.pngadmin2021-08-01 10:12:412023-05-05 09:46:49青年領導力 I – 掌握自己開創未來 線上雙語課程
課程回顧
由 Maria、Jock、The Haven Team 和 The China Team 團隊共同創造的漣漪效應在這個活動結束後仍持續發生。我在社交媒體上收到許多照片和視頻分享。在下面我收集了一些供參考。附上了5分鐘的“感恩視頻”如下。Yang 和 Paula，你們在翻譯和技術支援方面的專業確保了這次活動的成功。特別想告訴 Linda 老師，非常感謝你的出席，你對我和中國團隊來說情意深重，許多在這裡的中國朋友們都非常開心看到你在線。對 Maria 和 Jock 也致上我深深的敬意和愛 – 你們對彼此的愛，對廣大學員們的愛，以及對這個世界的愛，已經通過你們的言語和能量而閃耀流動。我聽到參與者許多的很棒的反饋，以下是一個參考的例子。
The ripple effect of the magic, co-created by Maria, Jock, The Haven Team and The China Team, is happening after the session ends. I have been receiving photos and video clips on social media. I collected some in the attached file for reference. I also attached the 5 minutes “video of gratitude” as follows. Yang and Paula, both your heart and expertise on translation and technology ensured the success of the event. My special thanks to Linda – I appreciate so much of your presence today. You mean dearly to me and The China Team. People were thrilled to see you online. My deep respect and love to Maria and Jock – Your loving towards each other, to people you are teaching, and to the world has shone through your words and spirit. I hear wonderful feedbacks from participants. Hereafter is a couple examples for reference.
這是我經歷最震撼和感動的一次線上課：500多位來自全世界各地的海文人，一同聆聽兩位殿堂級的心理學導師Maria和Jock分享他們的人生智慧。課程結束了整整一個小時我們都留在屏幕上不捨得下線，在眼淚和回憶中連結 … 101歲的maria最後說：「我雖然是老師，我也永遠是學生，我們永遠在成長。」含著熱淚，向知行合一的前輩恩師們致敬，感謝過去十多年來的引領，你們的生命影響了我的生命，我將會在薩提亞和海文收穫的瑰寶繼續傳承下去！
This is the most shocking and moving online class I have experienced: more than 500 Haven people from all over the world listened to the two great leaders on psychology Maria and Jock sharing their life wisdom. At the end of the course, we stayed on the screen for an entire hour, reluctant to go offline, connecting in tears and memories … 101-year-old Maria finally said, “Although I am a teacher, I will always be a student, and we will always grow.” In tears, I pay tribute to these two predecessors of the congruence of knowledge and action. Thank you for your guidance over the past ten years. Your life has affected mine, and I will continue to pass on the treasures I harvested in the Satir and the Haven!
Posted by Angel Chen on WeChat, 6:46 pm July 31st, 2021
This engaging dialogue is between Maria Gomori, one of the foremost teachers of Satir processes, and Jock McKeen, the co-founder of the Haven. These experienced educators will discuss the two approaches they represent in an online dialogue.
Virginia Satir (1916~1988) was renowned as one of the first and foremost influential family therapists in the world; but she was much more than that. She and the two founders of The Haven, Dr. Bennet Wong (1930~2013) and Dr. Jock McKeen, began their friendship in the 1970’s, introduced by their mutual friend Maria Gomori.
Dr. Satir once said: “Maybe I had so much success with people, not because of what I know but because of who I am.” The Satir approach emphasizes “self-validation,” in the context of family dynamics; Haven’s holistic view focuses on self-awareness and relational growth, blending Eastern and Western concepts. Although the two approaches have different emphases in some ways, they complement each other well.
Maria met Ben and Jock in 1974. She started out as their student, eager to learn their novel approaches. Since then the three became lifetime colleagues and best friends. Maria Gomori is one of the world’s foremost living proponents of the Satir Approach. In May 2021, she celebrated her 101st birthday online with Jock and her Haven friends.
The Haven and the Satir Approaches
“We connect based on our sameness and we learn from our differentness.” – Virginia Satir
Although there are some differences between the Satir and the Haven approaches, the underlying principles are very similar, sometimes described with different language. Both approaches invite us to investigate more deeply the puzzle of “who I am.” For both, there are many entry points and dimensions to this journey into the unknown. Please join us to witness these two long-time collaborators and friends as they share their unique mastery of their life-long study and practice.
“The Haven that Ben and Jock created is a unique school of life, a special place where people could learn about themselves and their life and relationships. The experiential residential programs they developed for Haven are remarkable learning opportunities that help people to understand themselves in deep and meaningful ways. Like Virginia Satir, they did not just teach from theory; they taught from what they lived.” – Maria Gomori
“Haven is a special place, a home, a context, a container with nature and beauty, where people can live the learnings both in the classroom and the environment.” – Maria Gomori
主講人 The Speakers 瑪莉亞‧葛茉利 Maria Gomori
MSW, RMFT, Dip.C
瑪莉亞‧葛茉利與維琴尼亞‧薩提爾一起學習和工作了20多年，自1981年以來一直是薩提爾全球網路Satir Network的主要導師。她在海文學院任教數十年，帶領《自我和家庭重建之旅》，最近她還線上指導《薩提爾進階課程》。海文出版了許多她的書，包括她的自傳《愛與自由》（繁體版）《自由的激情》（簡體版）。您可以在維基百科 (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maria_Gomori) 上閱讀更多關於瑪莉亞的生活和專業相關的信息。
Maria Gomori studied and worked with Virginia Satir for over 20 years and has been a main teacher in the Satir Network since 1981. She has taught at The Haven for decades, leading《Journey to Self》and more recently coaching 《Advanced Satir》online. The Haven has published a number of her books, including her autobiography,
《Passion for Freedom. 》You can read more about Maria’s life and career on Wikipedia (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maria_Gomori).
“Maria’s life is a testimony to the principles addressed by existential philosophies: freedom, authenticity, responsibility, and moral agency. With balance and courage, she also accepts the inevitable challenges of angst, loneliness, and paralyzing uncertainties. Her mind is alive with ideas, concepts, and novel perspectives on human beings.” — Bennet Wong & Jock McKeen
Jock McKeen, co-founder and Faculty Emeritus of The Haven, is an accomplished presenter and author. Starting out as an emergency physician, he studied acupuncture at the College of Chinese Acupuncture, Oxford, England. After establishing a complementary medical practice in association with Bennet Wong, they collaborated in the development of The Haven. They developed the Core Programs at Haven, wrote numerous books, and travelled extensively to share their approach in many countries. Ben and Jock frequently taught in Asia for many years, bringing their Haven teaching to Chinese speaking people. You can read more about Jock at the Wikipedia entry devoted to him and his life’s work (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jock_McKeen).
翻譯 The Translators 李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
心理諮商文憑、企業教練碩士認證、企管碩士、藝術學士、文學士、身心整合夫妻療癒認證、身體經驗創傷療法認證
CEC, Dip-C, MBA, BFA, BA, PACT Level II Certification, SE Intermediate II/III Certification
加拿大The Haven學院核心導師
加拿大The Haven學院前董事
加拿大The Haven學院前中國實習生總監
Wenshwu is passionate as an educator and a life coach. She is both personal and professional. She embraces life fully and keeps enriching herself in cross-cultural environment. Her leadership style is based on humanity, on which she effectively integrates her professional trainings with personal experiences. She applies various schools of learning: coaching, counseling, creativity, SE (Somatic Experiencing), and PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) in the series of heart-brain integrated personal and professional development programs. She designs and leads onsite workshops and online programs in greater China area, north America, and around the globe. In these programs Wenshwu witnesses so many people breaking through fixated patterns, transforming suppression to useful resources, and living fully in their unique beings. Wenshwu is so far the only Chinese approved to the Haven Core Faculty. She is also the founder of The Train Coaching & Counseling Corp. in Taiwan.
徐扬 Yang Xu
BA, MA, RCC
曾多年就职于加拿大维多利亚救济中心，从事流浪者及吸毒者的紧急心理救助及社会资源整合；曾就职于加拿大维多利亚家庭服务中心（Family Service of Greater Victoria），从事少年儿童及家长的心理治疗咨询，及组织带领团队的心理辅导治疗。加拿大彩虹堂（Rainbow Hall Society）非盈利组织咨询顾问，及同伴帮助项目培训导师。现作为独立心理咨询师进行线上及线下心理咨询，在同馨济慈健康咨询中心，华东师范大学，中智关爱通EAP等机构进行个人及家庭的心理咨询服务及团辅。玛瑞亚家庭治疗与家庭重塑学术委员会兼职助理。上海Halo后现代心理培训ICCP项目特聘翻译。
Yang Xu
I am a Canada BC Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC) with enthusiasm for working with clients from diverse cultural backgrounds. I received my B.A. in Psychology, and my M.A. in Counseling Psychology, both from University of Victoria. I believe in a collaborative and integrative way of working with my client, in hope of offering a safe and warm place to share feelings and explore solutions. Every individual has the possibility to change and grow, and my work is to find their own strengths and resources. I have been working in mental health for 10 years, from community to private practice. I’m currently working as EAP counsellor, family therapist, group facilitator and workshop translator in Shanghai, China and BC, Canada. Some other issues I’m exploring are addictions, LGBTQ+, international living, parenting, emerging adulthood and more. My professional training also includes Satir Family Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dynamic-Maturational Attachment Approach and Collaborative-Dialogue.
We had a new high on the number of participants – 121 (36 from Haven Canada website and 85 from The China Team’s website). The participants came from four continents covering 12 countries:
Europe – Paris/France, Rome/Italy, Switzerland
North America – LA/Sanfrancisco/Dallas/USA, Gabriola/Canada
Oceania – New Zealand, Sydney/Australia
Asia – China, Taiwan, Malaysia, Singapore, Japan
We had 8 males on the program, and this time all registrants are Chinese background. We received extremely well feedbacks from participants for a sensitive topic as such, especially in a context of China and Chinese culture. My deep appreciation to Elfi – for your heart and skills in guiding the program in such depth and richness. I also want to give my appreciation to the whole team, including the Haven in Canada and the China Team, and our 16 interns from China and Taiwan who facilitated the 16 small groups online and offline. This is a teamwork and a process of co-creation. Thank you ALL!
Daily life as “For Play” Erotic energy, or life energy, is the creative force that moves us into connection with life and with nature. It circulates within our own bodies and draws us to another. Each one of us began life through the dance of Eros between two people.
In human relationships sexual erotic energy can often be a source of misunderstanding and struggle, shame and guilt. With open hearts and deeper understanding about how erotic energy moves through our life and relationship cycles we can learn how to open to the pleasure of being fully alive in our senses, alone, and with each other. We learn to embrace the vulnerability and revelation that accompany erotic knowledge and sharing.
In this course you will be invited to learn how to nurture and engage your own erotic energy and, if you are partnered, how to share this with your loved one. We offer insight into the connection between erotic and spiritual experiencing through body centered learning, through dialogue with one another and self-reflection.
Erotic energy will ebb and flow even in the most loving couple. This could bring about suffering and misunderstanding in their relationship. We will explore how to communicate our erotic being with less shame, with honesty, and a loving heart.
Each session will focus on different topics related to Eros and Intimacy and you will be invited to continue your reflections in the time between sessions. These explorations will take place in an atmosphere of respect and every person’s choice is respected. The format will include:
Embodiment meditations
Presentations about Eros and Intimacy in Relationships
Experiential exercises
Small group sharing and reflections
Take home practices
Topics and Highlights
Overview on Perspectives of Erotic Living – The Seven Circles of Sexuality: Sensuality, Sexualization, Objectification, Intimacy, Sexual Identity, Whole Person Sexual Health and
Spirituality/Values
Sensuality: coming alive in the body through senses
Sexualization/Objectification: sex and power, sexuality post romance
Intimacy: eros in relationships, the desire for comfort vs the desire for novelty, the willingness to move from power to connection
Whole Person Sexual Health: physical/spiritual/relational, gender identity and roles, the role of values and spirituality in erotic life
Elfi Dillon-Shaw , Dip-C, is a massage practitioner, bodyworker and educator with 20 years’ experience fostering experiences of pleasure and well-being. She teaches programs on sexuality, body practices and stress management, including Sexual Intelligence, Stirring the Cauldron, and Eros and Intimacy (with her husband Gary Dillon). She has worked at The Haven since 1983.
李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
心理諮商文憑、企業教練碩士認證、企管碩士、藝術學士、文學士、身心整合夫妻療癒認證、身體經驗創傷療法認證
CEC, Dip-C, MBA, BFA, BA, PACT Level II Certification, SE Intermediate II/III Certification
加拿大The Haven學院核心導師
加拿大The Haven學院前董事
加拿大The Haven學院前中國實習生總監
Wenshwu is passionate as an educator and a life coach. She is both personal and professional. She embraces life fully and keeps enriching herself in cross-cultural environment. Her leadership style is based on humanity, on which she effectively integrates her professional trainings with personal experiences. She applies various schools of learning: coaching, counseling, creativity, SE (Somatic Experiencing), and PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) in the series of heart-brain integrated personal and professional development programs. She designs and leads onsite workshops and online programs in greater China area, north America, and around the globe. In these programs Wenshwu witnesses so many people breaking through fixated patterns, transforming suppression to useful resources, and living fully in their unique beings. Wenshwu is so far the only Chinese approved to the Haven Core Faculty. She is also the founder of The Train Coaching & Counseling Corp. in Taiwan.
親愛的文淑老師，剛聽完你們今天的影音回放，特別是在結束時您播放“You Are Not Alone“這首歌時，特別提到這首歌是要獻給來自世界各地的學員時，特別感到溫馨及感動。身在異鄉，此時全球疫情嚴重，無法回台灣探親及上成長課程。慶幸此時有機會能跟你們一起“隔空“學習。在瑞士獨自走在身心靈成長這一條路上有時覺得很孤單。但這一年多在YouTube 網路上聽您和佩霞老師演講，非常喜歡你們的樂觀，樂於助人，平易近人，親切及甜美的笑容，跟你們在網路上連結，學習成長，受益良多。很高興有你們影音的陪伴，知道“自己並不孤單“。由衷心地，感謝您及所有人付出，促成這一次課程的因緣。感恩！祝平安喜樂！
Most of us have been in situations where we have reacted strongly, ‘blindly’, to something that a loved-one has done or said. Often, we later regret our behavior, or we reinforce our opinion that it was the other person that did the wrong thing (and if only *they* just did the right thing, all would be harmonious!)
Or perhaps I keep seeing the best in someone who is clearly indifferent, demeaning or even openly hostile to me? And I don’t understand why they can’t just treat me kindly.
Those strong reactions seem to come from nowhere and they happen so fast and with such intensity that I seem unable to control them. It’s like being hi-jacked by my emotions: My rational, sensible mind seems to be unavailable at those times.
It is almost as if we are in a trance or a dream when this is happening.
Well, we are…
This ‘trance-state’ is related to our deeply held desire for love, support, nurturing, kindness, compassion, and connection. While they are certainly expressed differently across cultures, these are universal human ‘needs’ that transcend culture. We humans experience these needs in our bodies as well: the need for a ‘felt sense’ of connection and attachment to others is vitally important for people of any age.
To the extent that we did or did not experience these needs being met in childhood, we will seek them out as adults. On the surface, there is nothing unusual about this: We are deeply shaped by our earliest life experiences. The real issue is when we *unconsciously* seek others to meet these expectations. Unmet childhood expectations, unconsciously expressed in our adult life are often the source of much difficulty in marriages, families and even work relationships. Blame, resentment, deep disappointment, and despair are just some of the symptoms of us unconsciously expecting different outcomes with the people who are unwitting participants in our ‘trance.’
To make it even more ‘interesting’, we will act towards our partners, colleagues, and children as if they are our parents or other important figures from our childhood. As you can imagine, this is difficult and often bewildering for those who we are close to.
Along with these ‘trance-states’ come physiological sensations and symptoms. Our reactions are happening both in our minds and bodies. Thinking, reasoning, and rationalizing alone will not completely help us wake up from the impact of our past. Indeed, our bodies hold useful information about what is happening in these unconscious trances.
For the April Bilingual Online Program – our Haven Core Facilitators Graemme Brown and Wen-Shwu Lee apply a mind-body approach to provide a new perspective on our family relationships. In this workshop, we begin the exploration of how our early family experiences impact us in our present, daily life and what we can do about this. Our aim is to not change the past (impossible) but to change our relationship with the past (very possible!) and begin to live more fully in the present.
We use the work of wise elders (including Virginia Satir, Peter Levine, Bennet Wong and Jock McKeen, Eugene Gendlin and Jon Kabat-Zinn) to create tools that you can use in your daily life, beyond the workshop itself.
Topics:
1. The Impact of Family Rules
The two types of family rules
Transforming rules into guidelines
Befriending our inner rule-maker
2. Virginia Satir’s Iceberg Model
A map of our internal world and external behavior
A tool for deeper communication with self & others
3. Emotional Regulation
Grounding
Moving from reaction to response
4. Focusing
The importance of the ‘felt sense’
Tools for daily life
Developing resilience
5. Conscious Expectations
Becoming aware of what I want
Taking responsibility for my expectations: the doorway to freedom
主導老師 Leaders 葛萊姆·布朗 Graemme Brown
心理諮商文憑，身體經驗創傷治療師，自1985年以來一直與The Haven合作。他致力於「慈悲與溫和詢問」的鑽研，多年來專注於維吉尼亞·薩提爾模式、榮格的影子工作和彼得萊文的肢體經驗系統的研究。葛萊姆視他的Haven教職同仁為創意靈感的泉源，他們的風格和專業知識多種多樣。作為The Haven核心導師的成員，葛萊姆在中國和加拿大共同領導了Come Alive、Living Alive Phase I、Journey to Self、Family Reconstruction 和許多其他的成長課程。葛萊姆還是一位屢獲殊榮的錄音工程師，經營他的Zen Mastering工作室超過25年。他對音樂的熱愛和創作過程的奧秘在很大程度上體現了他在個人成長工作上所採取的模式。他目前在加拿大卑詩省的加布里奧拉島生活和工作。
Graemme Brown, Dip.C, SEP, has been associated with The Haven since 1985. He is dedicated to compassionate and gentle inquiry, focused on his experience with the philosophy of Virginia Satir, Jungian shadow work and Peter Levine’s Somatic Experiencing system. Graemme considers his Haven faculty colleagues as another source of creative inspiration with their great diversity of styles and expertise. As a member of The Haven’s core faculty, Graemme co-leads Come Alive, Living Alive Phase I, Journey to Self, Family Reconstruction, and a number of other programs on Gabriola, in China and with First-Nation communities in Northern Canada. Graemme is also an award-winning recording engineer, running his Zen Mastering studio for over twenty-five years. His love of music and the mysteries of the creative process inform much of his approach to personal development training. He lives and works on Gabriola Island.
李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
心理諮商文憑、企業教練碩士認證、企管碩士、藝術學士、文學士、身心整合夫妻療癒認證、身體經驗創傷療法認證
CEC, Dip-C, MBA, BFA, BA, PACT Level II Certification, SE Intermediate II/III Certification
加拿大The Haven學院核心導師
加拿大The Haven學院前董事
加拿大The Haven學院前中國實習生總監
Wenshwu is passionate as an educator and a life coach. She is both personal and professional. She embraces life fully and keeps enriching herself in cross-cultural environment. Her leadership style is based on humanity, on which she effectively integrates her professional trainings with personal experiences. She applies various schools of learning: coaching, counseling, creativity, SE (Somatic Experiencing), and PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) in the series of heart-brain integrated personal and professional development programs. She designs and leads onsite workshops and online programs in greater China area, north America, and around the globe. In these programs Wenshwu witnesses so many people breaking through fixated patterns, transforming suppression to useful resources, and living fully in their unique beings. Wenshwu is so far the only Chinese approved to the Haven Core Faculty. She is also the founder of The Train Coaching & Counseling Corp. in Taiwan.
Wen-Shwu Lee and Cathy Wilder, with their rich life experiences from the East and the West, and their professional studies on the subject, present to you this wonderful learning opportunity on Transform Addictions!
Many people say The Haven was “the missing link” in their recovery from a variety of addictive behaviors, which include cellphone, internet, coffee, sugar, food, work, sex, romance, or the familiar problems of cigarettes, alcohols, or drugs. This program is not a replacement for clinical treatment for alcohol, drug, food, and other addictions, but rather a complement or follow-up to protocols like the 12-steps or counseling. By integrating the Haven models based on eastern and western principles and philosophy, you’ll benefit from a holistic approach to your recovery. Learn practical tools to deepen your existing growth, tap into your inner resources, and find grounding and self-acceptance. This program is not for people actively using drugs or alcohol.
Program Highlights
This program is a partnership between The Haven (Canada) and Haiwen (China). We are grateful of the co-sponsorship so we can continue to offer transformational programs through The Haven and internationally.
In this program, you will discover healthy beliefs and learn practical tools to build your resilience on your journey of transforming addictive behaviors.
Wenshwu is passionate as an educator and a life coach. She is both personal and professional. She embraces life fully and keeps enriching herself in cross-cultural environment. Her leadership style is based on humanity, on which she effectively integrates her professional trainings with personal experiences. She applies various schools of learning: coaching, counseling, creativity, SE (Somatic Experiencing), and PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) in the series of heart-brain integrated personal and professional development programs. She designs and leads onsite workshops and online programs in greater China area, north America, and around the globe. In these programs Wenshwu witnesses so many people breaking through fixated patterns, transforming suppression to useful resources, and living fully in their unique beings. Wenshwu is so far the only Chinese approved to the Haven Core Faculty. She is also the founder of The Train Coaching & Counseling Corp. in Taiwan.
Cathy Wilder, Haven Core Faculty, MEd, RCC, Dip-C, is a creative and compassionate group leader, counsellor and coach, who leads Come Alive, and Deep Listening: Core Skills for Coaching, and other workshops in both Canada and China. She is a skilled clinical counsellor with a specialty in addictions, alongside a deep understanding of mental health concerns, working with Fraser Health MHSU for twenty years.
Haven Fundraising Program ~ Bilingual Online Webinar
A Conversation: Ancient Wisdom for a Modern World 一個對話：現今世界的古老智慧
主講：Jock Mc’Keen + 李文淑 Wen-Shwu Lee
Opening into Presence and Wisdom 敞開心迎向當下與智慧
主講：Cathy McNally + 馮錚 Sean Feng
| 時間：1/30, 2021
| 學員：345人
This is our first Bilingual Program in 2021 – the Haven Fundraising Program, that we are offering via Zoom at the end of January. This program is not only an exciting growth program but also a meaningful fund-raising event. The program fee will be donated to support Haven’s continuous growth! We are grateful The China Team has generously offered to cosponsor this event so that we can continue to offer transformational programs both at Haven and internationally.
